Bold Predictions for 2014

So in the spirit of the new year I'm going to kinda throw down on paper some of the ideas running through my head for what 2014 will be like. I've divided up my predictions into sections to fit the variety of people who may happen across my blog one of these days. I hope you enjoy!

PA HS Predictions
1. Despite losing All-Americans like Russell and Barchet, Henderson Coach Kevin Kelly will still end up piecing together a squad that gets in the state title conversation.
2. Kyle Francis will win the 800m indoors despite the hype around Wiseman, Logue, Lewis, and Brehm. It will be a state meet record 1:51.59
3. Wiseman and Brehm will run the entire race in lanes 3 and 4 respectively in order to try and prove to all their haters that they are not actually dirty runners, but this strategy will ultimately end up backfiring.
4. Griffin Molino and Dan Shalala will battle Rad Gunzenhauser for greatest name of a sub 16 minute 5k guy. Brad Miles will try to argue his punny name deserves to be in the discussion, but ultimately the judges will disqualify him.
5. O'Hara's DMR goes to nationals and runs a state record.
6. In a post race interview Kevin James says the success is all thanks to the time I autographed his face.
7. The Malvern Prep boys will pull the upset at indoor states in the DMR over a slew of tired squads who are doubling key runners.
8. Will Cather will qualify in every event from the 400m to the 3000m including the 4x8 and DMR. By states he will be so confused as to what he actually should run, he freaks out about all the options and hops in the 4x2 for his squad. He runs 20.65 to bring home the Gold.
Professional Running Predictions
9. Galen Rupp will set up a chase of the American record at 5k, but in a surpising kick finish Jager will jump on his shoulders and pass by him on the final straight away.
10. Bernard Lagat will end up winning the race and breaking his own AR with a 12:52 at 52 years of age. He will some how once again escape PED charges.
11. After a meeting with Jarrett Felix at the Millrose Games, Robby Andrews is so concerned for his safety from this stalker that he sprints around the track in an American record 2:17.02. Nick Symmonds ask Steve Finley for a meeting with Felix in order to chase the outdoor records he has in mind.
12. David Rudisha will have a super over hyped 1500m run in which, despite predictions that he will run 3:27, he actually runs 3:37. Once everyone writes him off as washed up, Rudisha will go to Reiti and drop a 1:40.86 to break his own world record.
13. Mary Cain will continue her assault on all of my PRs. After she notches a 1:58.93 to beat his 800m, she manages to convince meet directors at the Lehigh Invitational to let her race him head to head in a 400m during which she drops a 50.6 to Jarrett's 51.6. He get's made fun of but only cries for 32 minutes.
NCAA Running Predictions
14. Trying to hold the burden of huge expectations, Ed Cheserek will struggle to break 13:50 in the 5k. He will, however, get a strong grasp on the English language.
15. Jim Spisak and Alfredo Santana, a couple PA alumns that got no respect in HS, find themselves as the top PA guys in the NCAA as both run under 13:40 in the 5k this spring.
16. Jonas Oppenheimer outkicks Chris Stadler in the mile at indoor conferences as Stadler's ears are not quite powerful enough to beat out Jonas's.
17. Mac Fleet will look like he is on his way to a repeat title in the 1500m outdoors at Hayward Field, but he will begin his pointing at the crowd celebration a little too early and be outsprinted to the finish by Wisconsin's Austin Mudd.
Muhlenberg Predictions
18. The Muhlenberg 4x8 will finally dip under the 8 minute barrier with a thrilling 7:59.98 time.
19. The 4 members of the relay will be Kieran Newcomb, Forrest Kentwell, Bobby McGetrick and Steve Finley dressed up as Zach Lifman after a growth spurt.
20. Josh Elkan finally gets his chance at the 5k at the outdoor home meet. He runs strong for 4900m but is caught and outkicked by a suprise burst from Zach Lifman on the final straightaway. After Elkan screams out the F bomb at the top of his lungs, Coach Hackett is forced to suspend him, thus taking away his 4x8 spot.
21. Kenny Wohl, determined to prove the doubters wrong, will come back in amazing shape from his trip abroad. After a fantastic XC season that included a 26:37 run, he will, unfortunately, roll his ankle during a 10 mile long run on the track.
22. Alex Weiner will go abroad in the fall. He will be kicked out and sent back to Muhlenberg.
23. Josh Elkan and Zach Lifman will enter the conference meet as the 6th and 7th men locked in a tight battle. However, at conferences Alex Weiner, recently kicked off his abroad trip, gets in shape just in time to beat both gentleman over the last 800m. Things really get upsetting when Charlie Kline, once again coming back from injury, takes the 7th spot for regionals.
24. Both Josh and Zach still will run at Regionals at Dickinson. Kenny rolls his ankle and gives up his spot and Coach Steve will find out Charlie graduated last year and will not let him run.
Miscellaneous Predictions
25. Stephen Curry's Warriors will be a 7 seed in the West, but in a dramatic upset will beat the Spurs, Blazers and Thunders will get to the NBA finals against the Miami Heat. Curry makes a game winner over Lebron making this picture surprisingly relevant:

26. The Philadelphia Eagles will make a dramatic run to the NFC championship game against the Seattle Seahawks to the dismay of Jarrett, who will be forced to root against his boy Russell Wilson in the championship game.
26.2 Jarrett will lose interest in trying to make his blog the track version of Grantland somewhere around January 15th, but then will try and hold on to the tiny sliver of fame he has left in Forrest's videos that go up on his blog. After a variety of people call him "the creepy old guy" he will quit his position. The next day Flotrack will hire Forrest to be a permanent feature of their site.


More to come later this week if ya'll are interested.